Hilarious Pick-Up Lines
#1 Let’s make like a fabric softener and snuggle!
This one’s very cute. You’ll avoid seeming like your average pick-up artist by starting slow. Who doesn’t love a good snuggle?
#2 Would you grab my arm so I can tell my friends I’ve been touched by an angel!
Admittedly, this one does show you care a little too much about the opinions of your pals. However, sell it right and your crush will grab more than your arm by the end of the evening. Who knows where such casual touching will lead?
#3 There is something wrong with my cellphone. It doesn’t have your number in it!
It’s not exactly a manufacturer’s fault, but if you sell this right it’s a great way to get some digits. Just remember to use that number once you get it. This line will make sure they’re waiting for your call!
#4 You shouldn’t wear makeup. It’s messing with perfection!
This is one of those pick-up lines that skirts dangerously close to being insulting. Sure, you’re wuestioning her current fashion choices. But at its heart this line says she shouldn’t cover up her natural beauty. It’s risky, but it might just pay off.
#5 I know I’m not a library book but I can tell when you’re checking me out.
Nevermind that most of the world has switched to e-books. This one works because it turns the tables on your crush. It takes real confidence to deliver well though.
#6 If this bar is a meat market, you must be the prime rib
They say that flattery can get you everywhere. This pick-up line might test the theory. Sure you’re comparing your potential love interest to a piece of meat, but at least it’s quality meat!
#7 I was blinded by your beauty, so I’m going to need your name and number for insurance
This one manages to find the right balance between cute and cheesy. It’s so inoffesive, it just might work. Who doesn’t enjoy a good compliment?
#8 I wish you were DSL so I could get high-speed access
Sure, this one might suggest that you’re impatient. We prefer to think of it this way though. He who hesitates is lost. So why would you want to hesitate?
#9 Your hand looks heavy. Let me hold it for you.
This one reminds us that chivalry isn’t dead. Use it on a feminist and she might remind you she’s more than capable of holding up her own hand, thankyou very much. But pick your target and they’ll appreciate your old-fashioned charm.
#10 Are you a keyboard? Because you’re my type!
This one should appeal to lovers of classic literature and music nuts. It’s cheesy, but there’s nothing wrong with some strong cheddar! Just make sure you quit the keyboard analogies after it’s broken the ice.
#11 Can I borrow a kiss? I promise I’ll give it back.
Only if we let you Casanova. This one’s incredibly forward, but if delivered with the right amount of charm it just might work. It should work for a late-night smooch if nothing else.
#12 Do you have a map? I just keep on getting lost in your eyes.
If you can’t navigate someone’s eyes, there’s probably little hope for you. She’ll either suggest you buy a GPS, or take it in the spirit it’s intended. If it’s the latter, you’re in.
#13 Is that a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.
OK, we admit, this one’s pretty crass. But it’s also kind of clever. If she laughs instead of slapping you, make sure you take advantage of that broken ice.
#14 Hi! The voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.
There’s something to be said for the quirkiness of this approach. Some girls might steer clear of you, but others will appreciate your originality. After all, those voices aren’t guiding you to do awful things. How bad can they be?
#15 Did you fart? Because you blow me away!
This isn’t going to work on the princesses, which is a real part of it’s charm. If you’re looking for a down-to-earth partner who isn’t afraid to laugh at themselves, use this line. If they giggle, they’re probably your perfect match.
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